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Видео добавленное пользователем “Roger Libby”
What is a Board Certified Sexologist?
A board certified Sexologist is one who studies sex as an interdisciplinary approach, including the history of sexology, and the pioneering work of people like Kinsey, Masters and Johnson and European sexologists. It's a person who studies sex as a researcher, not just as a therapist. I am a board-certified sexologist from the American College of Sexology and the American Academy of Clinical Sexologists. I'm also a board-certified Sex Therapist--the primary certification comes from the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT), and I'm also certified by the American Board of Sexology. While the two intertwine to some extent, a lot of sex therapists have very little background in sexology. They've never done sex research, like I have done. They've just taken courses so they know how to do sex therapy. Unfortunately, there are plenty of counselors who call themselves sex therapists who are not board-certified. They may be marriage counselors on Psychology Today's web site where people look for a sex therapist, but they're not real sex therapists. Psychology Today's web site is meaningless in terms of endorsing people for credentials that they don't even check out. I believe we need standards. Anybody who does sex therapy should be board- certified as a Sex Therapist. I have been on the Institute for the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality faculty and still am, and I've spoken at The Kinsey Institute. I am a sex researcher and a sex educator as well as a sex therapist. Research helps do a better job as a sex therapist. Education without knowledge is impossible. - Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 717 Roger Libby
What if I'm Afraid of Getting Sex Therapy Help?
Coming to a sex therapist is a big decision for some people. Why is it a big decision? Sometimes it's because they're embarrassed to say 'I have a problem that's sexual and I really don't know if I can handle trying to talk openly about it with my partner and with a stranger who's a therapist. I help people relax. This is what I do for a living--just like the weather man talks about the weather. Or you to to a mechanic to fix a car. You come to a sex therapist who's board-certified to solve a sexual problem. Everything is confidential. I maintain complete respect and compassion for the people I work with. I use a sense of humor to solve the problem. If you don't come in, it's a bigger problem. If you let something go, it's harder to solve. It's too much water under the bridge. For example, if a couple hasn't had sex in five years. It's harder to solve the problem so it's a marriage beyond a legal marriage. There may be resentments,health or medical problems, communication problems, or other problems that would impact their sexual relationship. I take a multi-variate approach. I deal with the medical, the physical, the mental and the relationship variables to put a puzzle together. Each puzzle is different. I am a puzzle master, I use Cognitive Behavior Therapy and I use my own knowledge of medical, physical and mental issues about sex to solve problems. - Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 273 Roger Libby
Sex and Porn Addiction is not an Addiction
There is no such thing as sex addiction! Counselors who call themselves sex addiction therapists are poorly trained. They have little to no data to support their approach, and it's also poorly defined. That's why the DSM, the statistical manual that therapists use to diagnose problems chose not to include sex addiction or hyper-sexuality in the new version of the manual. They didn't even include sex addiction in the appendix to study it further because they didn't take it seriously enough to do so. I think they were right. To have sex "addiction," you'd have to be addicted to something external to the body like alcohol or a drug. Sex is part of the body (not external) so this doesn't qualify. Using a disease model for sex is not a useful concept. What it does is reinforce guilt and shame about sex instead of taking a "sex positive" approach. Sex addiction is a myth. This doesn't mean that some people don't have problems being out of balance like becoming too obsessed with pornography on the Internet. These people come to my office and I help them get into balance by using basic Cognitive Behavior Therapy, helping them realize that sex is a good thing that you have to put into context along with other things. The sex addiction people would say they know what is "healthy." How many times should you masturbate in a week, for example. This varies a lot between different people. So instead of instilling guilt and shame about sex, I try to provide a sense of balance so the person accepts themselves for who they are. They get beyond being compulsive and obsessive about sex.
Просмотров: 669 Roger Libby
What is Sex Therapy Like?
To be effective, sex therapy has to be carried out by an effective, board-certified sex therapist who can deal with a variety of sexual and relationship problems. Often, people come to me with a sexual problem, like an erection problem, not recognizing that they may have a lot of other problems that contribute to that sexual problem. For example, a man could come to me with an erection problem, and then I find that the woman has a problem not having orgasm or painful intercourse, or vaginismus which is where the vagina muscles clamp down and won't admit the penis in intercourse.
Просмотров: 88 Roger Libby
What is Homework in Couples Counseling?
What I mean by homework is assigning written and behavioral exercises. Some of those exercises are in writing--like Mood Logs where you identify your distorted thoughts and exchange them for rational thoughts. Sometimes I ask clients to write a journal so we have more to talk about in the next session. Putting it on paper helps us get in touch with what we need to do and how to do it far better than just reading a book. I approach all of this with compassion and with humor, and I ask people to do the homework, including what I call a "session" at home once a week where they discuss what they need from each other to improve their communication.
Просмотров: 43 Roger Libby
What is Sex Positive Sex Therapy?
What does it mean to be "Sex Positive?" We still live in a Puritan culture. We have more positive aspects of our culture sexually but there's still too much shame and guilt, mostly from rigid religion. Rigid religion is the arch-enemy of sex, as Wilhelm Reich said in Germany in the 30's. We need to take a very positive, imaginative, uplifting, healthy approach where we say "Yes" to sex, not no to sex! We need to find more reasons to have consensual sex, rather than more reasons not to. So I believe we need to be imaginative and be playful to be on the same pleasure team with whomever we make love with. My approach is "Sex Positive" rather than one that is full of censorship and fear. - Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 112 Roger Libby
When to take an ED (erectile dysfunction) pill?
ED (erectile dysfunction) pills like Viagra and Cialis would seem to require special timing. How should you plan ahead for sex?
Просмотров: 92 Roger Libby
How can Cognitive Behavioral Therapy help?
Cognitive Behavior Therapy is my major framework for solving sexual problems along with the medical issues. The reason Cognitive Behavior Therapy is so effective is that it's short term. You're working to change thoughts, feelings and behavior, You try to get rid of negative thinking and replace it with more rational thinking. You do "Mood Logs." You write out your thoughts. You realize that some of your thoughts are really making it impossible to enjoy sex. Often, negative thoughts short circuit the connection you need for real sexual intimacy. I help people change their thoughts to get rid of negative thinking, like thinking that because they have a problem, they always are going to have a problem, which is called "fortune telling." Some blame themselves or blame their partner for the problem, which makes them spin their wheels in the sand so they don't solve anything. Once they get rid of negative thinking, the whole world opens up. The whole oyster of better sex and being a sexual enthusiast comes into being. Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 129 Roger Libby
Does an Affair Doom a Marriage?
Affairs and flings don't have to signal the end to a marriage. To the contrary, often it's an amber light for something to attend to--to make the marriage more vibrant, including sexually. I work with lots of couples who've had affairs or flings. Sometimes the spouse comes in first and doesn't want the other spouse to know, but he/she wants to improve their marriage. In other cases, they both know because one of them discovered their spouse having an affair from a cell phone or the Internet, a credit card bill or some other red flag. Affairs don't have to end a marriage. You have to regain trust, and this is something that takes a while. Regaining trust requires 'trust and verify." Sometimes it takes a little longer to work with a couple with an affair to regain trust than for a lot of the other problems I deal with. Flings rarely come out since they are things that may have happened only once or occasionally, whereas an affair is a more emotionally charged, ongoing relationship which is more likely to be discovered. Affairs can be a lot more complicated as far as the effect on a marriage. I work with thoughts and communication, and put the emphasis on improving the marriage rather than getting all the gory details of what happened. - Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 42 Roger Libby
Where is the Humor in Sex Counseling?
Unlike a lot of therapists, including sex therapists and couples counselors, I emphasize humor and being playful. This provides a sense of balance and a perspective so that you don't take yourself too seriously. You need to look in the mirror and see a cartoon character. I believe that it's important to "say yes to sex," to be a sexual enthusiast. I wrote a humor book, a glossary of cartoons, "Sex from Ahhh to Zipper." The subtitle emphasized "Love, Lust and Laughter." In that book, I emphasized taking a humorous approach, redefining concepts like "Slut." Instead of being a putdown for women who are highly sexual , it became a "Sensuous, Liberal, Unbelievable Temptress." I like to redefine words that are negative into more positive words because we need more positive words to express and feel sexual enthusiasm. I believe that sexual enthusiasm is a lot better than trying to moralistically label someone a "sex addict" or a "man whore" if they have more than one lover. All the concepts that have come out in our Puritan culture. It's time our culture grows up, and humor is a part of that. It's a way to get beyond sex-negative Puritanism that is too prevalent with a lot of people who come to my office for help.
Просмотров: 62 Roger Libby
Counseling Married Couples Alone and then Together
Dr. Roger Libby explains how his marriage and couples counseling first sees couples apart and then together.
Просмотров: 13 Roger Libby
Keeping a Sense of Humor About Sex
Dr. Roger Libby has written a humor book titled, "Sex from Aah to Zipper," explaining why it is so important to be able to love and laugh together.
Просмотров: 17 Roger Libby
Better Sex? Communicate!
Seattle marriage counselor and sex therapist Dr. Roger Libby puts communication on top of your list for better sex.
Просмотров: 13 Roger Libby
What is Fast Track Marriage and Couples Counseling?
By "Fast Track Couples Counseling," what I mean is that I see people separately and then together. I give them homework. I also give them specific suggestions that are very direct, as opposed to a passive approach like a lot of therapists who have a "How do you feel approach?" which is not a treatment plan. What I do is work as quickly as I can. As long as people do the work and come in prepared for the next session, they don't need to see me very long. Most problems can be solved in a matter of weeks to months, not years. I believe when people see the same therapist for years they just hear the same message. They go that long because they don't have a direct treatment plan to solve the problem in a shorter time frame.
Просмотров: 7 Roger Libby
Why do we pathologize sex?
Seattle Marriage Counselor and Certified Sex Therapist Dr. Roger Libby asks "Why do we pathologize sex?" Instead of guilt or shame, Dr. Libby takes a "Sex Positive" approach.
Просмотров: 24 Roger Libby
Sex from Aah to Zipper by Seattle Marriage Counselor Dr. Roger Libby
"Live, Love and Laugh!" explains Seattle marriage counselor Dr. Roger Libby who literally wrote the book on keeping a sense of humor in your love life.
Просмотров: 124 Roger Libby
Change Your Sex Life? Change Your Sex Position!
Seattle marriage counselor and certified sex therapist Dr. Roger Libby explains that changing your sex life might mean changing your sex position.
Просмотров: 47 Roger Libby
Marriage Counseling on the Seattle Waterfront, Go with the Flow!
Want your marriage to go more swimmingly? Just add water! Dr. Roger Libby, a Seattle marriage counselor and board-certified sex therapist, feels like water has a therapeutic value for his patients.
Просмотров: 21 Roger Libby
Will watching Internet porn affect my sex life?
Pornography has its pluses and its minuses. We're never going to get rid of explicit sex, nor should we. My position is that we need sex that is more meaningful--where there's a script--where it's not just two actors acting out sex like two dogs without any sense of what it means or who are these people, or anything else. In some cases, individuals and couples can watch erotic pornography and get turned on and become more sexy and imaginative in their own sex lives. In other cases, they're watching stuff that's unhealthy like incestuous themes with a stepfather, or a voyeur looking at somebody in a dressing room at a department store. This can get you in big trouble.It can land you in jail. It means you're out of balance. I help people of both sexes who are obsessed with pornography to gain more of a sense of balance about their sex lives, so they can masturbate without necessarily having to look at porn. They can develop their own fantasies. This is much more healthy than acting out a script in their heads for real, good sex, hopefully with a partner, or at least with themselves. - Dr Roger Libby is an AASECT-licensed Sex Therapist and a Board-Certified Sexologist who practices in Seattle and Poulsbo, Washington.
Просмотров: 391 Roger Libby
Sex and Water - H2-ohhhh!
Seattle marriage counselor and certified sex therapist Dr Roger Libby advises: Let's get out of bed and make love where water flows like the passion between two lovers.
Просмотров: 56 Roger Libby
Technology Can Distract from Better Sex
Tech is cool but it can get in the way of intimacy. Learn how to avoid these distractions and let your love light shine!
Просмотров: 60 Roger Libby
ED (Erectile Dysfunction) Drugs and You!
How to think about ED (erectile dysfunction) drugs as a solution for better sex.
Просмотров: 15 Roger Libby