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Brain-Dead Teen, Only Capable Of Rolling Eyes And Texting, To Be Euthanized

Оценок: 202356 | Просмотров: 16161009
The parents of 13-year old Caitlin Teagart have decided to end her life, saying she can now do nothing but lay on the couch and whine about things being "gay." Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
Категория: Юмор
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Текстовые комментарии (89222)
Keenan Green (6 часов назад)
omfg i watched this whole thing dying inside last year because i thought it was real
Rachael Liz (7 часов назад)
The only news station I would ever watch 😂
Pigninja 2003 (7 часов назад)
I am here to protect the people from getting r/wooshed. Any comments posted after this comment is not allowed to be r/wooshed
Lily H (9 часов назад)
In the description Things being “gay” Just the quotations 👏👏 We love a queen
Arnis Blumentals (14 часов назад)
Lol imagine in irl arguing with her online and actually calling her braindead ? Lol...
Atomic Knight (15 часов назад)
damn how much they paid the family
Aliens and dogs (1 день назад)
XD
Bugbears and Wormwood (1 день назад)
What are seacon head ignore ants
Patrick Sliz (1 день назад)
Lmao when I was like 9 I left a serious comment on this saying how my sister also is addicted to her phone but we shouldn’t kill her I’m dead
Brandon Jendrusik (1 день назад)
Someone else could use her organs better then her so kill her (and if you haven't figured it out yet it's FAKE with a capital F,A,K,E,
Disfigured Shovel Face (1 день назад)
Fake
Eggplant Eggs (11 часов назад)
Disfigured Shovel Face It’s the onion, that’s the point
Deeter (1 день назад)
30 thousand people got woooosh'd
RetroX (1 день назад)
The scrolling text on the bottom is the best part
Gecko Dude568 (1 день назад)
I remember seeing this a few years ago and thinking this was actually real
V904T (1 день назад)
FUCK!! I THOUGHT THIS WAS REAL AND SAW THE UPLOADER ONION FUCK!
SYARekt (1 день назад)
my parents are actualy believe this
• Loser • (2 дня назад)
The best part of this video is the description.
Puppy Power Productions (2 дня назад)
WHY TF WOULD YOU KILL YOUR DAUGHTER JUST BECAUSE SHE IS BRAIN DEAD LIKE ARE U GOOD BRO?!!??
RTBland (12 часов назад)
woosh
woshieman 2 (2 дня назад)
Its fake you dope
HotWater (2 дня назад)
I saw this video few years back. At the time i actually thought it was real
T3KTONIT(cVec) (2 дня назад)
idk why but i actually believed this ._.
Dragon Ballz (2 дня назад)
When I first saw this six years ago I thought this was legit
Hot Dog Studios (2 дня назад)
This is what happens when you give your child a cell photo it’s all about Motorola
Amelia Tuberlayo (3 дня назад)
Wait I can’t tell if this is real
1234pistol (2 дня назад)
this is real
Klo (2 дня назад)
its completely real, this is the onion which is a legitimate news program
Just Your Everyday Pig (3 дня назад)
Anybody over the age of 18 who doesn't understand this is fake should meet the same fate as Caitlin
vV_EvanSonic (3 дня назад)
She played too much fortnite!!1!1!1 Get her a roblox account1!!1
LT GLITTER (3 дня назад)
My dad thought this story was real lol
Zemirah YisRAEL (3 дня назад)
What happened to her now
Klo (2 дня назад)
she was euthanized
xerx3s (2 дня назад)
HAHAHAHAHA
Just Your Everyday Pig (3 дня назад)
She died on February 30th
Seb Led (3 дня назад)
Oh my god. I ate the onion
myusernamethisiss (3 дня назад)
That xray with the phone in it lmaooo
Erik Breitenstein (3 дня назад)
You should have Thrown her divisis in the trash for her own good
Erik Breitenstein (14 часов назад)
Im joking
Isaiah Hykes (2 дня назад)
Please tell me you're joking and you're not actually this stupid.
Christian Afonso (3 дня назад)
Woah. I remember seeing this YEARS ago and thinking it was REAL! Imagine my shock. I finally realized that the onion was fake though. Lol
ally bovitz (4 дня назад)
when i was little i saw this and it scarred me, but i remembered this video the other day and watched it and i’m laughing so hard right now why tf did i believe this
Amanda Martinez (4 дня назад)
Im sorry i couldnt take this seriously😂😂
cancer (4 дня назад)
*COMA PATIENT DOES NOT RESPOND TO BEING DRESSED IN HUMILIATING CHIQUITA BANANA HAT*
Tina Ramirez (5 дней назад)
Why are all you damn fool is making this out to joke you guys are all stupid idiots your cell
Klo (2 дня назад)
+Symmetrix why do you ruin it?
Symmetrix (4 дня назад)
r/atetheonion its a fucking joke.
tendertears2001 (5 дней назад)
sad ................
Honeypeanutyay (5 дней назад)
Dauher
default with 13 subs (5 дней назад)
Man i love the Onion
Matthew Stanford (5 дней назад)
"OMG IM BEING KILLED"
StuuDude (5 дней назад)
End her life!? What
Edmund Faust (2 часа назад)
+Symmetrix I mean, why would you use r/whatever outside of reddit? Thats cringeworthy
Symmetrix (10 часов назад)
+Edmund Faust How about you find out yourself.
Edmund Faust (12 часов назад)
+Symmetrix What does this have to do with reddit?
Symmetrix (4 дня назад)
r/atetheonion its a joke.
alex hernandez (5 дней назад)
Is this shot real
Klo (2 дня назад)
+BenDoesThingsare you stupid? It's completely real, I can't believe how insensitive you are.
Just Your Everyday Pig (3 дня назад)
BenDoesThings its very real. She died on February 30th 2012 unfortunately
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
Very
BenDoesThings (5 дней назад)
No, it's the Onion lol
AnduRo (5 дней назад)
When you watch one of the Paul brothers for 10 minutes straight.
noman ahmed (5 дней назад)
whats a brain dead
wizardlord89 (5 дней назад)
Everyone sort by new for free karma on r/atetheonion😂🤣🤣
Hudson Dunn (6 дней назад)
If only
The Subservient Human (6 дней назад)
Imagine a universe where this was commonplace though. Seems like good story fodder to me.
Kasey Lock (6 дней назад)
Only now do I realize that it's just Onion Satire. It's been over a year.
Joe Duke (6 дней назад)
1 down, 1 billion more to go.
Tomsavage101 Savage (7 дней назад)
OK that’s got to be fake
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
The Onion is never fake. :(
skyeyemx (5 дней назад)
This is The Onion
Tomsavage101 Savage (7 дней назад)
Why are you sitting there not saying why the fuck are you killing me
Tomsavage101 Savage (7 дней назад)
The dad and the mom or total dickhead’s
wizardlord89 (5 дней назад)
TeHwolf are you taking the karma or will I?
TeHwolf (6 дней назад)
Tomsavage101 Savage r/atetheonion
Tomsavage101 Savage (7 дней назад)
All she’s doing is using your phone too much I mean I get it yeah that’s being an idiot but to seek permission to kill her wtf
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
Been just doesn't want you to take action. This is very real.
BenDoesThings (5 дней назад)
This is a video on the "Onion", a satirical "news" source.
Not_your_average_cheese-greater lol (6 дней назад)
Tomsavage101 Savage r/wooosh
MrDanmakuFellow (7 дней назад)
I love how the dad low-key roasts Caitlin throughout the entire video
Jadine Alcide (8 дней назад)
wait this fake!? Iwas like what world am i living in! lmao
Symmetrix (4 дня назад)
yea it is fake.
Beta Wolf Gaming (8 дней назад)
Why don’t the parents just take the phone away
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
+Symmetrix Jokes on you man. This is no way a joke you sick fuk!!! It's satire.
Symmetrix (4 дня назад)
r/atetheonion its a joke.
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
They were getting bad comments on Facebook. This was the only way.
Jimmy Beale (8 дней назад)
Is this real????
Klo (2 дня назад)
Mafic Ik what satire is. This is not satire and obviously real
Mafic (2 дня назад)
+Klo the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices, particularly in the context of contemporary politics and other topical issues. synonyms:mockery, ridicule, derision, scorn, caricature; More a play, novel, film, or other work that uses satire. plural noun: satires "a stinging satire on American politics" synonyms:parody, burlesque, caricature, lampoon, skit; More a genre of literature characterized by the use of satire.
Klo (2 дня назад)
+Mafic what do you mean "satire". its clearly real
Just Your Everyday Pig (3 дня назад)
Its real. She died on February 30th 2012
TeHwolf (6 дней назад)
Yeah it is so totally real so real in fact that it is real it’s real
Bsbdbd Dhdbdb (9 дней назад)
She is not brain dead. Brain dead mean you brain stops working but her heart will continue going for about a week. If you are brain dead than you will likely be in a coma. You would not be able to talk or open up your eyes even. I don’t know how they long thought she was brain dead for but in my opinion she is not brain but she does have another medical condition.
Isaiah Hykes (2 дня назад)
R/atetheonion
white Rabbit but secretly a cherub (4 дня назад)
r/atetheonion
Slayingdeath Gaming (7 дней назад)
r/whoooooosh
Inner Voice (9 дней назад)
Hahahaha
catlover33baseballmom67 (9 дней назад)
KILL HER!!!! ALL OF THESE TEENS ARE GOING TO HELL AND GOD DOESNT LOVE THEM!!!
catlover33baseballmom67 (8 часов назад)
+xX_L00t_Xx you think I wasn't trolling? Lmao
xX_L00t_Xx (15 часов назад)
+catlover33baseballmom67 Imagine thinking you can get away from your stupidity by playing it off as a joke. Har har har.
catlover33baseballmom67 (1 день назад)
+xX_L00t_Xx /r/woooosh
BaileyStracha (3 дня назад)
xX_L00t_Xx my man
xX_L00t_Xx (3 дня назад)
1: /r/atetheonion. 2: God isn't real and your cult is a lie.
Pottu munakas (9 дней назад)
So her "brain" is just randomly browsing facebook? Why would she do that if she cant even hear u?
toadaso1 (7 дней назад)
This is satire. They are making jokes about apathetic teenager's.
happy feet (9 дней назад)
She put nail polish on and spoke
Ben Cummings (9 дней назад)
Forest spirit troubles by increase of homeless sex. Citibank criticised for keeping hundreds of rats in bank vaults. Off-duty cop shoots on-duty prostitute.
DVincentW (9 дней назад)
Many people need this to end their banal agony.
tyt for life (9 дней назад)
This is cruel
xX_L00t_Xx (9 дней назад)
/r/AteTheOnion
Leigha Freiberg (10 дней назад)
I don’t know if this is fake or not?
xX_L00t_Xx (9 дней назад)
/r/AteTheOnion
Chicken Nugget (10 дней назад)
I’d probably stay in my bed and not even touch my phone
Smokey Potate (10 дней назад)
“Are you for real killing me right now?”
cloudenvying (10 дней назад)
lol the ticker on the bottom "DONALD TRUMP VOMITS DURING HELICOPTER RIDE"
KAREN Hernández Flores (10 дней назад)
Do not kill her :'(
Michael Richter (4 дня назад)
She is already gone :( Not only that, they rejected the organ donation due to improper paperwork.
xX_L00t_Xx (9 дней назад)
/r/AteTheOnion
Margaret Nolan (11 дней назад)
Who would say “It’s ur dad” and “ the real kaitlyn is already gone it’s just her body texting” fakest crap
Captain Obvious (10 дней назад)
If you can't see that this is satire... you yourself must be Brain dead.
LlamaDrama Bitch (11 дней назад)
What Is this a joke😂
Fruitty Tutti (10 дней назад)
r/AteTheOnion
2shots Of vodka (11 дней назад)
What on dankest thing is this...
indian Aquarist (11 дней назад)
I was so stupid that I was watching this news for the last 6 months and ohhhhh😑😑😑😑
Connor Stickels (12 дней назад)
I accidentally went from this video to a sad ABC video, not realizing it wasn't the Onion. Was a gut punch
Greg Bradshaw (12 дней назад)
are you for real killing me right now?
Alexander Barnett (12 дней назад)
Many kid are experiencing a level of extreme stupidity in their homes no it's just you being stupid
Fruitty Tutti (10 дней назад)
r/AteTheOnion
Fellow Citizen (12 дней назад)
"There's such a thing as 'privacy'."
Beta Wolf Gaming (13 дней назад)
You hear that if you are on your phone too much your parents will legally kill you
Lego Universe Returns (11 дней назад)
*ali-a intro plays*
Ahmed Bihi (13 дней назад)
Is this real tf
xX_L00t_Xx (9 дней назад)
/r/AteTheOnion
Ystv Zoltev (14 дней назад)
Is this this fucking real??? I dont fucking know whats real or not anymore!!!! Fuck!!!!!!!!
Fruitty Tutti (10 дней назад)
It is actually disgusting that someone would do this
Ystv Zoltev (11 дней назад)
Fuck, Jesus!!!!! Whhhhyyyyyyyyy!!!???!?????!! Gosh, darn it. Why cant it be me, and.. Not her...
Dante integra (11 дней назад)
Yes. They put her to sleep.
Lego Universe Returns (11 дней назад)
It’s real
Asia VEVO (14 дней назад)
If this was actually real wow
Maurice Glenn (14 дней назад)
Ok so she was def not brain dead how tf did her parents get away with this
Ted Striker (12 дней назад)
Because it's satire, moron.
Mike T (14 дней назад)
I thought this was real at first. Their solution is to shoot that lazy bitch in the head.
Aaron Castilo (15 дней назад)
FAKE CLICK BAITT
wizardlord89 (5 дней назад)
Aaron Castilo or maybe it's an obvious joke meant to be entertaining?
bobluv22 (15 дней назад)
My mom and dad would've killed me if I ignored them
Jayden Playz (15 дней назад)
2:49 lmao
Erikswag 24 (15 дней назад)
I hope you all know the onion posts fake stories and funny story’s and no I’m not a Donald trump “fake news!” Fan
Joshua Ogwe (15 дней назад)
Are you for real killing me right now
internet ! (15 дней назад)
She can still apply lip gloss
Ami Sabanta (16 дней назад)
I thought this was for real before
Lil Calf (15 дней назад)
Are you fucking serious.. 😂
Sorry, not sorry. (15 дней назад)
+Lil Calf it's a sATIRICAL NEWS CHANNEL, YA TWAT! IT'S THEIR JOB!! (Minor overreaction, but still)
Lil Calf (15 дней назад)
+Sorry, not sorry. Explain how that was a woosh, ik it's a joke, I'm just wondering why they went this far for a joke..
Sorry, not sorry. (10 дней назад)
Woooosh
Shashwat Sharma (16 дней назад)
OMG TOO GOOD
Julian Lewis (17 дней назад)
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Brendan Ebenhack (17 дней назад)
OMG!!! I saw this video so long ago and just realized that I ate the onion!
Donelle Glatt (17 дней назад)
👻
lavender town rocket commander (17 дней назад)
What caused her to become brain dead
BaileyStracha (3 дня назад)
all of these occurrences are common causes......
Slayingdeath Gaming (7 дней назад)
She had ligma bro
Dante integra (11 дней назад)
Anal sex
Master Debater (15 дней назад)
lavender town rocket commander snapchat
Aspen Welch (17 дней назад)
I clicked on the video bc i wanted to see my biography!💁
Ava Blackwell (17 дней назад)
even though there is a little thing called privacy 👌🤣😂
Zollie dennis (17 дней назад)
Omg i just relized this was fake LMAO!??!? 🤣
Master Debater (15 дней назад)
Zollie dennis it’s not fake. It’s a very sad story. May she rest in peace
Your Typical Boss (17 дней назад)
When parents get that abortion they always wanted

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