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Brain-Dead Teen, Only Capable Of Rolling Eyes And Texting, To Be Euthanized

Оценок: 184486 | Просмотров: 14941922
The parents of 13-year old Caitlin Teagart have decided to end her life, saying she can now do nothing but lay on the couch and whine about things being "gay." Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
Категория: Юмор
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Текстовые комментарии (80193)
Jayme Reyna (1 час назад)
I know it’s fake but how is it fake
Cobra (1 час назад)
Now this, this is just fuckin' hilarious 😄
Ella Niamh (2 часа назад)
Is this real???!!
Aquila Raisha (4 часа назад)
Omg she's probably just having "phase"
Sadik Meah (5 часов назад)
Killing your children is not the right thing to do... Especially if you're having sex with them
Asha O'Hearn-Harvey (5 часов назад)
This is one of the first YouTube videos I’ve ever seen on my own phone. I thought it was real. I was scared.
DJ_Hyper Fresh (5 часов назад)
I need to turn on some Despacito like right now
shu Master's (6 часов назад)
This is happening to me
FantaAddict (7 часов назад)
Read the bottom text lmao.
Lexis Astorga (7 часов назад)
So what exactly happened to her to be like that?
Asia Krekling (7 часов назад)
Is this real?
Lauren Keeley (8 часов назад)
Lol is this a joke
Jackson Graves (8 часов назад)
Is this real??
Vicky Brimberry (8 часов назад)
Fake
Sky. Bird. (8 часов назад)
my dad showed me this, And i thought it was real. i was so pissed off
Lisa Martinez (8 часов назад)
2:01 "What do our taxes go to anyway" Asks Stupid Man 😂😂😂
Max26 (8 часов назад)
Just take away her phone
skrrt skrrt (8 часов назад)
Max26 wooooooooosh
Felina Ash (9 часов назад)
Woow
DEEZLE THE AMAZING DOG (10 часов назад)
WHY DIDNT THEY JUST TAKE HER FREAKING ALL OF HER STUFF AWAY
skrrt skrrt (8 часов назад)
DEEZLE THE AMAZING DOG because she will collapse into a forever coma
robo man379 (10 часов назад)
She standing wtf
Julianna Crisp (10 часов назад)
THE DESCRIPTION H MY GOD
emily johnson (10 часов назад)
is this fake or ??
emily johnson (10 часов назад)
nevermind it is
Annika Williams (11 часов назад)
Wait..is this fake I’m confuseddddd
skrrt skrrt (8 часов назад)
Annika Williams of fucking course it is
Jayda Blunte (11 часов назад)
If this is a joke this should be taking down off of YouTube cause it's not funny
Ahmed Khan (10 часов назад)
it is a joke u stupid bitch and its so funny
Jayda Blunte (11 часов назад)
Is this a joke
skrrt skrrt (8 часов назад)
Jayda Blunte no
Candice harvey (12 часов назад)
God please let this be fake....
Pika Bamboo (12 часов назад)
donald trump vomits during helicopter ride...what a news
lucy (12 часов назад)
is this real? this can’t be fucking real.
Leilani Elfverson (13 часов назад)
How is this category comedy
POW Gaming (13 часов назад)
She'd probably murmur "are you for real killing me right now?" But then her "struggle" will finally be over.
** Sierra's ASMR ** (13 часов назад)
Howndumb are ppl
Naia Springer (14 часов назад)
Is this real??
Vault 112 (14 часов назад)
I thought this was real
Jaime Beeep (14 часов назад)
Isn't She A Teen? Facebook Is For Old People!
Fribbi D (14 часов назад)
sounds just like puberty
The Bulletin Manager (15 часов назад)
But she is alive?
MARDI GRASZZ (16 часов назад)
Wtf?
Nugget Zonked_Gamer (16 часов назад)
I sware it's like she's joking, how TF is that even possible?! 😤 WTF what she's doing is the definition of TEEN, that's normal!!!!
khaledking1019k2 (16 часов назад)
I just realized this is fake because it's Onion
Dawn Pickard (17 часов назад)
She is still functioning how could they do that
eltsen nestle (17 часов назад)
Relax. They killed her already.
Mitty Mitts (17 часов назад)
WHY THE HELL IS THIS CATEGORIZED AS COMEDY
moi (14 часов назад)
oh my fucking god you're so retarded
The Rockaholic Experience! (18 часов назад)
This is like 90% of kids these days.
The Flames (18 часов назад)
Literally just take away the fucking computer and phone tf these parents suck
Dialinet b (18 часов назад)
First of all I'd slap the shit outta her Second of all I would throw her phone to the other side of the universe Third of all why tf she got a Justin Burner poster
Joseph deSantos (18 часов назад)
i straight up wonder how the f they did this
Girl on YouTube O_o (18 часов назад)
This made me cry.This girl is a year younger than me.i couldn’t imagine if my life was cut that short
DominikΩ омега сеншу (19 часов назад)
This is so sad! Can we hit disabled people?
geek wonder (20 часов назад)
They killed her there going to hell all they had to do is pray for her God will make it better not fucking kill her
geek wonder (14 часов назад)
moi you're the one that's retarded talking about onions Girl by
moi (14 часов назад)
geek wonder It's The Onion. For fucks sake you're retarded.
geek wonder (14 часов назад)
moi and bitch I'm praying for your edges
geek wonder (14 часов назад)
moi if I didn't right just say so stop being a pussy they legally killed her she not fucking alive so tell me what am I wrong about last I funckin checked she's dead sooo
King becker 1st (21 час назад)
Parents: *Kills* Daughter: Are you for realz killin me?
King becker 1st (21 час назад)
Child: *gives parents silent treatment* Parents: she's not even their Parents: I know, let's kill her
McTouka kid (21 час назад)
Why are we all getting this recommended now? I watched this in like 2012....
UNICORN POPCORN (22 часа назад)
D I S G U S T A N G
UNICORN POPCORN (22 часа назад)
D I S G I S T A N G
D Adams (23 часа назад)
It doesn't take a medical pro like myself to see this is obviously fake. Takes a real sicko to make a video like this.
Karissa Brathwaite (1 день назад)
For a little bit I thought this was real
anii_ lizard (1 день назад)
“We literally have to drag her to the car in the morning to go to school” BRUV SHE AINT THE ONLY ONE
Adanna Chira (1 день назад)
Is this fake😂😂
Andrew Wooten (1 день назад)
This is so sad Alexa play fortnite
Hot Dogs! (1 день назад)
Oh my god , I didn't realize this was -a joke- until I saw it was uploaded by *The Onion.*
Exposed to the core (1 день назад)
Is this real?
Peelmobil (1 день назад)
Have they tried turning off the wifi
danny devito (19 часов назад)
Peelmobil she has data
Reneemay Mitchell (1 день назад)
This is a joke right?
It’s yah boy Little gas pump (1 день назад)
Is this fake???
new (1 день назад)
Is this a joke? Anyone that can sit up and use a cell phone is NOT brain dead.
Those stupid kids at the end are the ones thinking the onion is real
Madison Kennedy (1 день назад)
is this even real
Amirra Shamma (1 день назад)
I can't tell if this is fake or not
Charles Terry (1 день назад)
This is a joke
Candra (1 день назад)
For those that don't know, The Onion is satire. It's a joke.
uuunderlinee (1 день назад)
Oh my God! I thought it was real! 😂😂😂😂😂
Jasmynn Craft (1 день назад)
I HEARD HER SAY "I have cramps" and "I don't even.." SHE COULD'VE MAFLDE IT THROUGH
Abby Helton (1 день назад)
This is so fake
Heavydirtyeggos #1 (18 часов назад)
Abby Helton soooo why did you need to say it was fake? It's satire, you obviously didn't understand that.
Abby Helton (19 часов назад)
Heavydirtyeggos #1 no dip Sherlock
Mmm tasty onion
Heavydirtyeggos #1 (1 день назад)
it's a satirical channel, of course it's fake
Abby Helton (1 день назад)
Heavydirtyeggos #1 ¿
Tim Mower (1 день назад)
THIS IS SO SAD, ALEXA, PLAY DESPACITO 😔
dawnn (1 день назад)
I’m really stupid, the first time I saw this when it came out I was really sad that she died because I thought it was real..
Maggie (1 день назад)
Euthanasia is fucking inhumane, how dare someone have another legally killed! It's just as bad, if not worse, than execution!
Heavydirtyeggos #1 (1 день назад)
r/atetheonion
Shanquel Williams (1 день назад)
WTF did they kill her because she was texting a lot? I hope this was not real because if it was the mom and dad need a lot of help 😤😡😒😞😱🙅🙎
danny devito (19 часов назад)
Shanquel Williams you are so fucking stupid your parents should be fined for letting you become this stupid
Shay Renae (1 день назад)
This is fake
Crowfolk (1 день назад)
bastards
P Pet (1 день назад)
Don’t waste money on the injection! Drive to the PCH and push her over a cliff; then leave her there to feed the local flora and fauna. Simple!
J.T Narwhal (1 день назад)
*_coma patient does not respond to being dressed in humiliating chiquita banana hat_*
marco leonards (1 день назад)
this is a joke right?
Rat Face (23 часа назад)
marco leonards nope
cymphetic (1 день назад)
no
yecks (1 день назад)
marco leonards no
GodOfGamers 112 (1 день назад)
I think her brain will cold start IF U BREAK HER ELECTRONICS AND RAM THEM OVER WITH A TRUCK 35 TIMES AND THROW THEM IN A RIVER!!!!! +1 If u agree
Blurryface (1 день назад)
lmaoo
ThatCookieDoughBoy (1 день назад)
This is so sad, alexa play despacito
Squirrel Fish (1 день назад)
Lol I love this
Romel Tabang (1 день назад)
This is so funny.. The title and description killed me lol 😂😂😂
Nusaiba Alsaidi (1 день назад)
People are not supposed to choose when to die, that's God's job. You will be punished by God in the after life severely if you so do so wether you commit suicide or homicide(with homicide the murderer should repent and ask for God's forgiveness, but for suicide I am sorry because it is too late. Only exceptions are those who do deserve the death penalty by God like those who commit homicide and the family of the ones murdered choose the the death penalty for the murderer or forgiveness. Also those who who are married and commit adultery get death penalty(By the way I already know I am going to receive a lot of replys for people defending this one, but I do not mind because I worship God and not people)(Just think if you have an open mind and follow God's commandments you should understand that severe crimes deserve severe punishments which will hence most likely will decrease the sin from increasing. Also those who commit other serious corruption can get death penalty. I believe we should have patience with sick loved ones and keep praying to God along with doing our best and leave God the rest.
Isn't that a tasty onion
cymphetic (1 день назад)
no
Rin. Eli (1 день назад)
lmao you believe in God and btw this is a joke jeez..
KLYN KLUB (1 день назад)
😂😂😂😂😂shes just a pain in the ass ungrateful lil thing but damn just have her adopted
Botond Szabadka (1 день назад)
its like a southpark episode.
Brian Guevara (1 день назад)
Bruv this is a fucken joke
Brian Guevara (1 день назад)
Is this a joke or is this Fr Fr
JuvyGamesOMG (1 день назад)
Whats brain dead?
JuvyGamesOMG (1 день назад)
MasterHand what does it make them do?
JuvyGamesOMG (1 день назад)
MasterHand how?
MasterHand (1 день назад)
Brain death is the complete loss of brain function
JuvyGamesOMG (1 день назад)
I'm kinda like that I get bored without technology but we kids can't help it we were born in the generation. I like playing with friends and swimming, but most of the time I go on tech and maybe draw and watch tv. Born in the moment, interact I'm the moment.
akkdd awy (1 день назад)
1:17 skskksksks
untamableLPS and stuff (1 день назад)
take her phone away
Bella Bijou (1 день назад)
This is so disturbing.....and funny
Rain James (1 день назад)
Her parents are fucking monster killing their own child.
Leela (1 день назад)
Rain James it's a joke bud
Lamar Warburton (1 день назад)
Send her parents to jail
christian campo (1 день назад)
she needs despacito 2 to break her suffering :-)))))))))
Maia Marsden (1 день назад)
i hope this is fake because its just being a teenager

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